what if you died and the last thing you did was make someone feel bad about themselves
Me using my last breaths: This is the last time you’re gonna see me and you wore that?
What did Delaware to a party?
A New Jersey
Only east coasters will understand
"don’t complain, I have it worse than you"
the horror and concentration on his face
So a while back i was at this party and i was the first girl to arrive and there were like 20 guys already there, we were all siting around, having a beer and whatnot when the dj arrived. So all the guys went out the front of the house to help set up the dj gear and it was just me sitting there alone in the backyard for like 5 minuets. I stood up to go follow them bc i was getting really bored when i realized something, my period had gone through my white pants and stained the while chair, i was humiliated, i had no idea what to do, i could hear the guys were coming back and i had to do something quick, time was running out. So i grabbed the chair, ran like 10 meters and threw it over the fence into the neighboring yard, i quickly walked back and tied my jacket around my waist. The guys soon returned and didn’t suspect a thing, i am amazing.
Fucking hell, it took me a few minutes to realise what the fuck was going on.
Are you a fisherman because I think you’re a reel catch
You spelled real wrong.
Throw this one back into the water boys we’ve got ourselves a city slicker
this is how my little sister and i text